Retirement jokes

Funny jokes about people in retiremnt.

jokes: 11 - 19 of 19 |previous jokes1 2
category: Retirement jokes11.

You must keep in shape.
My grandmother started walking five kilometers when she was 60 and now she's 97, and we don't have a clue where she is!

joke rating: 3.53 of 592 votes

category: Retirement jokes12.

A good looking young man (to an old woman):Do you know any lady who likes the pink color, Madam?
Old woman: Why?
Young man: I would like to marry her.
Woman: I like pink color very much.

joke rating: 3.52 of 592 votes

category: Retirement jokes13.

A guy with bright blue, green and orange color hair was standing at a bus stop.
Few moments later an elderly man stood near him and kept staring at him hard.
Annoyed by the stares the guy asked him, "Wotz up oldie! Never done something wild?"
To this the old man replied, "Yeah,I f*cked a peahen once and I'm wondering if you are my son."

joke rating: 3.54 of 592 votes

category: Retirement jokes14.

An elderly woman went to her doctor, complaining about not being able to hear out of one ear.
The doctor then took his penlight, looked in her ear, then took his tweezers, reached in, and pulled something out.
After examining the object for a second, he exclaimed, "Well....it seems you inserted a suppository into your ear...".
The old lady thought for a second, then responded "Gee....I guess that explains why I can't find my hearing-aid...!".

joke rating: 3.53 of 591 votes

category: Retirement jokes15.

I used to hate weddings, all the old ladies would prod me and say 'you'll be next !' They soon stopped that, when I started saying it to them at funerals !

joke rating: 3.57 of 616 votes

category: Retirement jokes16.

A 90 year old women goes to the doctor.
Dr i can't stop farting, sure they don't smell and make no noise but still i can't take it any more.
Well take these pills every day and come back in a week.
Dr what did you do to me not only am i still farting now they smell as well!
Oh very well , now about your hearing...

joke rating: 3.53 of 590 votes

category: Retirement jokes17.

The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before the boss does.

joke rating: 3.53 of 591 votes

category: Retirement jokes18.

There's one thing I always wanted to do before I quit...retire!

joke rating: 3.53 of 591 votes

category: Retirement jokes19.

Two elderly ladies were discussing the upcoming dance at the country club. "We're supposed to wear something that matches our husband's hair, so I'm wearing black," said Mrs. Smith. "Oh my," said Mrs. Jones, "I'd better not go."

joke rating: 3.53 of 592 votes

jokes: 11 - 19 of 19 |previous jokes1 2

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