New jokes

10 last added jokes in our collection ordered from newest jokes to older ones. There are new jokes added daily. Please rate new jokes by clicking on smiles, so new jokes will be also rated!

A man is driving down a highway in his Ferrari when he is pulled over by cop!
The driver says: Officer why did you pull me over?
The cop says: For speeding!
The driver says: Why officer I saw a sign back there that said 90!
The cop says: That is the road number sir!
The driver says: Thank God you didn't pull me over on highway 181!!!

62.46% (14 votes)

Q:- When did Pinocio find out that he was made from wood?

A:- When he caught fire.

62.46% (14 votes)

Q:- What is the difference between "alligator" and "crocodile"?

A:- See you later and see you in a while.

62.46% (14 votes)

The students sat quietly in the class.
The teacher could see that they were getting bored so she decided to play a game with them.

TEACHER- OK, students, let's play a game!


TEACHER- The game's name is Answer The Question. So who would like to go first....How about you, Anne?

ANNE- OK, I'm fine with that.

TEACHER-OK, question is...what do you like about your teacher?

ANNE- Nothing.


58.3% (15 votes)

Q:- Why are computers so smart?

A:- Because they listen to their motherboards.

62.46% (14 votes)

This two guys are flying from Los Angeles to New York.
The pilot says: Welcome it will take us 3 hours to get to New York so sit back and enjoy the flight.
A half hour later the pilot says: We just one engine but we still have three other engines so we will be arriving at the destination a half hour later then scheduled.
An hour later the pilot says: Well we just lost number two engine but we still have two good engines left so we will be arriving an hour and a half late.
The pilot then says: Well I'm sorry to announce that we just lost the third engine due to mechanical problems so we will be arriving at our destination three hours later then expected.
One guy turns to the other and says: You know if that last engine breaks I have a feeling that we will be up here all day long!

62.46% (14 votes)

This gay guy is in the doctor's waiting to get a prostate exam!
The technician walks in and as he is ready to do the exam, the gay guy says: Could you use two fingers when you do the exam?
The technician says: Why two fingers? The gay guy says: I liked a second opinion!

62.46% (14 votes)

This big executive comes out of the restroom and one of the secretary says: " Mr. Smith your garage door is open.
The executive thanks her and goes to his office and sits down to work and he was looking for something he notices that his zipper is down so he thinks that that was what that girl meant. The next day he confronts the girl and says: Yesterday when you told me that my garage door was opened did you happen to see a big red shinny Caddylac in there? and she says: "No, all I saw was a pink little volkswagen with the two front tires flat!

62.46% (14 votes)

The teacher tells her students: "Students tomorrow I want you to bring me a story that has to do with s*x."
The next day the students are ready and the teacher says: Ok she asks the first girl to tell the class a story on s*x!
The little girl says: Teacher the neighbor's cat had little kittens!
The teacher says: That's a good story and she asks the next student and he says:" Teacher I climb the tree in my back yard and there was a bird's nest full of baby birds"! The teacher now asks Johnny to tell her a story on sex! Johnny says: "teacher there they were the Lone Ranger and Tonto surrounded by Indians and so the Lone Ranger and Tonto shot and k*lled all the Indians teacher! The teacher says:"Well Johnny that's a perfectly good story but, what does that have to do with s*x? Johnny says:"Teacher nobody F**ks with the Lone Ranger".

62.46% (14 votes)

This lady suffers a heart attack and goes to the hospital for surgery as she was on the operating table she haas a vision and she says: "God is it my time? and God says:"No my child you have forty years, thirty days and eight hours to live".
She says:"Thank you God!". As she she was in the hospital recuperating from the surgery she decides to have a face lift and a tummy tuck and changes the color of her hair. She is ready to go home and as she was crossing the street to the parking lot a car runs the light,hits her and kills her! She goes before God and says: "God I thought you sad that I had forty years thirty days and eight hours to live? "Why didn't you pull me from in front of that car and save me?
God says:"I didn't recognize you"!

62.46% (14 votes)