Family jokes / page 5

jokes: 41 - 50 of 81
category: Family jokes

Three kids come down to the kitchen and sit around the breakfast table.
The mother asks the oldest boy what he'd like to eat. "I'll have some f*ckin' French toast," he says.
The mother is outraged at his language, hits him, and sends him upstairs.
She asks the middle child what he wants. "Well, I guess that leaves more f*ckin' French toast for me," he says. She is livid, smacks him, and sends him away.
Finally she asks the youngest son what he wants for breakfast. "I don't know," he says meekly, "but I definitely don't want the f*ckin' French toast."

70.52% like joke (594 votes)
category: Family jokes

A little girl asked her mother, "How did the human race appear?"
The mother answered, "God made Adam and Eve and they had children, and so was all mankind made.."
Two days later the girl asked her father the same question.. The father answered, "Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved."
The confused girl returned to her mother and said, "Mom, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Dad said they developed from monkeys?"
The mother answered, "Well, dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family and your father told you about his."

70.6% like joke (591 votes)
category: Family jokes

- Mum,can i dress a bra?
- No.
- Why not.I am 14 years old!
- How many times I will say you "no", Michael...

70.42% like joke (596 votes)
category: Family jokes

This eighty year old couple were celebrating their 60th anniversary and the wife says to her husband, " Honey lets get stark naked and sit at the dinning table and eat our dinner!"
As they sat at the dinning table the wife says, "Honey I am beginning to get very hot and very aroused!"
The husband says, " That is because you have your tits in the soup!"

70.66% like joke (595 votes)
category: Family jokes

Husband: everytime I hit you, you never fight back. how do you manage your anger?
Wife: I clean the toilet seat.............
Husband: how does it help
Wife: I use your toothbrush!!!!

70.78% like joke (594 votes)
category: Family jokes

Its my birthday today. My wife has said that shes going to make it my most special birthday ever ...
I wonder where shes going ?

70.66% like joke (592 votes)
category: Family jokes

HOW did an Intelligent BOY PROPOSE to a Girl.
He TOOK the Girl ALONG with him on a BOAT & in the MIDDLE of River said: "LOVE ME or LEAVE the BOAT."

70.64% like joke (595 votes)
category: Family jokes

Son - "Dad whats the difference between confident and confidential?"
Dad - "Hmm. You are my son. Of that I am confident. Your friend Timmy is also my son. That's confidential."

70.7% like joke (593 votes)
category: Family jokes

A traveling salesman rings this doorbell. 10 year old little Johnny opens, holding a beer and smoking a fat cigar.
The salesman says, "Little boy is your mother home?"
Little Johnny taps his ash on the carpet and says, "What do you think?"

70.72% like joke (590 votes)
category: Family jokes

Wife says to husband:

- I am tired of being your maid, I am filing for divorce!
- No, you are fired!

70.68% like joke (592 votes)
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