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Best 100 short funny jokes based on visitors votes. Please rate funny short jokes by clicking on smiles, so funniest jokes will be also best jokes on our web site!
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funny mosquito
jokes: 81 - 90 of 100
category: D*rty jokes81.

A guy walks into a bar with a pet alligator by his side. He puts the alligator up on the bar. He turns to the astonished patrons.
"I'll make you a deal. I'll open this alligator's mouth and place my privates inside. Then the gator will close his mouth for one minute. He'll then open his mouth and I'll remove my unit unscathed. In return for witnessing this spectacle, each of you will buy me a drink."
The crowd murmured their approval. The man stood up on the bar, dropped his trousers, and placed his privates in the alligator's open mouth. The gator closed his mouth as the crowd gasped. After a minute, the man grabbed a beer bottle and rapped the alligator hard on the top of its head. The gator opened his mouth and the man removed his privates unscathed as promised. The crowd cheered and the first of his free drinks was delivered.
The man stood up again and made another offer.
"I'll pay anyone 100 dollars who's willing to give it a try."
A hush fell over the crowd. After a while, a hand went up in the back of the bar.
A blonde woman timidly spoke up.
"I'll try, but you have to promise not to hit me on the head with the beer bottle."

rating: 3.55 of 676 votes

category: D*rty jokes82.

He came into my room late at night. He sat over my body, He sucked, swallowed and he left. It was terrible. It was a BLOODY MOSQUITO!

rating: 3.55 of 608 votes

category: D*rty jokes83.

What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"?
"FIRETRUCK"!!! What were you thinking?

What starts with "P" and ends with "ORN"?
..."POPCORN"!!
What were you thinking?!?!?!

rating: 3.55 of 639 votes

category: Yo mama jokes84.

Your mama so ugly, when she went to a stripping club, they paid her to keep her clothes on.

rating: 3.55 of 712 votes

category: Kids jokes85.

A Ham sandwich walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink.
The bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve food."

rating: 3.55 of 650 votes

category: Yo mama jokes86.

Yo Mamas so stupid she was yelling into the mailbox. We ask her whats she doing and she said, she was sending a voice-mail.

rating: 3.55 of 630 votes

category: Women jokes87.

A lady went to see a tarot reader woman who'll predict her future:

- Lady, I'm sorry to inform you that your husband will die in the near future.
- Don't tell me things that I already know, tell me if there would be an investigation!!

rating: 3.55 of 599 votes

category: Yo mama jokes88.

Yo mamma so ugly even Bob the Builder said, "We cant fix it."

rating: 3.55 of 645 votes

category: Family jokes89.

Wife: Why do you go out in the balcony, when I start singing.
Husband: Because the people would think I am beating you.

rating: 3.55 of 636 votes

category: One line jokes90.

I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any..

rating: 3.55 of 607 votes

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