Best jokes / page 7

jokes: 61 - 70 of 100
category: D*rty jokes

A girlfriend and boyfriend walked into the girlfriends house and the girlfriend said to her mom, "Mom, me and my boyfriend are going up to my room" and the mom says, "Ok honey, you kids have fun."
When they are up their the mom hears: "Baby baby baby oh!"
The mom walks to the door and ask, "What the hell is going on?"
The girl says, "Mom were just having s*x." and the mom says, "Oh thank god I thought you guys were listening to Justin Bieber."

71.52% like joke (672 votes)
category: D*rty jokes

Little Billy came home from school to see the families pet rooster dead in the front yard.
Rigor mortis had set in and it was flat on its back with its legs in the air.
When his Dad came home Billy said, "Dad our roosters dead and his legs are sticking in the air. Why are his legs sticking in the air?"
His father thinking quickly said, "Son, that's so God can reach down from the clouds and lift the rooster straight up to heaven."
"Gee Dad that's great," said little Billy.
A few days later, when Dad came home from work, Billy rushed out to meet him yelling, "Dad, Dad we almost lost Mom today!" "What do you mean?" said Dad.
"Well Dad, I got home from school early today and went up to your bedroom and there was Mom flat on her back with her legs in the air screaming, "Jesus I'm coming, I'm coming" If it hadn't of been for Uncle George holding her down we'd have lost her for sure!"

71.52% like joke (638 votes)
category: Kids jokes

Why is it so hot in a stadium after a football game?

Because all the fans have left.

71.5% like joke (667 votes)
category: Retirement jokes

I used to hate weddings, all the old ladies would prod me and say 'you'll be next !' They soon stopped that, when I started saying it to them at funerals !

71.46% like joke (618 votes)
category: School jokes

Teacher: Name two days of the week that start with "t".
Pupil: Today and Tomorrow.

71.44% like joke (640 votes)
category: D*rty jokes

Daddy, what are those two spiders doing," she asked? "They're mating," her father replied. "What do you call the spider on top," she asked? "A Daddy Longlegs," her father answered. "So, the other one is a Mommy Longlegs," the little girl asked?
As his heart soared with the joy of such a cute and innocent question he replied, "No dear. Both of them are Daddy Longlegs.
The little girl, looking a little puzzled, thought for a moment, then lifted her foot and stomped them flat. "Well," she said, "that may be OK in California, but we're not having any of that crap here in Texas."

71.4% like joke (1020 votes)
category: D*rty jokes

A guy walks into a pharmacy and buys a pack of condoms. The cashier asks him if he wants a bag. He responds, "No, she's not that ugly."

71.4% like joke (764 votes)
category: Yo mama jokes

Your mama so ugly, when she went to a stripping club, they paid her to keep her clothes on.

71.4% like joke (745 votes)
category: Kids jokes

Q: What is a bee that cant make up his mind?
A: A maybe.

71.38% like joke (740 votes)
category: Political jokes

Mexicans cross the border 1....2....and 4 at one time, never 3. why?
Because the sign says - no tres passing.

71.38% like joke (628 votes)
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